Cognitive Dissonance and Fashion Rationalization: The Jacket Saga

Look at the jacket on the right. What do you see?
If you answered anything but "everything", you would, in fact, be wrong.

I don't know how or why this happened to me. I think I was actually looking up a different type of jacket when I stumbled across these. And afterwards, everything I knew had changed. This isn't to say that I've never had a soul-cripplingly pathetic episode where I project copious importance onto an article of clothing I didn't own; I've been there before*. The problem with this particular jacket, however, is that it is currently still attainable.

For 300+ dollars. US.

The amount of time I've spent searching for an available and cheaper alternative is too embarrassing to detail, though I have to admit, and in a shameful undertone no less, that I dreamed about finding one. It's not that I can't afford it- I'm fortunate enough to even be able to consider it- the consuming thought is whether or not doing it will make me a terrible person.

"Literally Everything Ever" or not, it's still just a jacket. Can I really reconcile spending so much money on it when people are barely making ends meet? When so many people are starving? Would spending the money on smaller, less Important (but, also, more important) and less expensive things somehow be a better alternative? Should I do without, purely on principle? Should I even feel bad about it?

Is this Catholic guilt? Probably. I don't know. It could also be cognitive dissonance. I want to be against consumerism (because it is Not A Good Thing), but I still want to buy something expensive because I really like it. I really, really, really like it. So much. So very much. However, this conflicts with this ideal of anti-consumerism that I've been trying to adhere to, to the point where I can't make out the line between treating myself and flagrant spending.

I'm very hung up over this jacket, in case you couldn't tell. It's disgusting.

But life is short and I really want it. It's beyond gorgeous, I'd wear it all the time and I'd give it to my child as the tightest, most radical heirloom ever conceived. But, more importantly, I shouldn't have to rationalize my decision within myself.

Or should I? I don't know. I just really want that jacket.

I'm hoping the price will go down soon or that it's going to reappear somewhere else in the near future- and less more than $300. But what'll likely happen is that one of the nine other watchers on eBay will buy it first. We're all equally thirsty, I can just tell.

And as much as I want that jacket, the world's not going to end if I don't get it. I'll never get over it, probably**, but I have a lot going for me. I'm not going to shut down because of expensive clothing. And I'm definitely not compromising and buying the cheaper, less cool version on the left.

Because that is a sidekick's jacket.
That is a side chick jacket.

*I'm still not over this.
**Definitely.